You have no idea

how much I love you.

Last night, we curled tight together on the tiny love seat and locked legs and squeezed middles tight. We had just finished a spontaneous spa time- soaked our feet in feet baths and clipped nails. You thought it'd be a good idea to sit in your bath and you were a smiling soaking mess by the time we were done.  I just kept thinking, "God has given me a daughter to share my world with. I am so blessed. I am so smitten with love."

And so, after our feet were dry and our clothes were dry, we cuddled close together on that tiny couch and held each other close and even sang that song you love: "This Little Light of Mine". And when I sing it with you, your smallish voice raising octaves in laughter and smiles, I can't help but think you are my little light, shining, beaming. You have no idea...

And we sat for a long time, long after your bed time, and we just held each other and talked about all the things important to you. And I gazed at this beautiful brown-eyed girl and wondered how so fast you became who you are now? I remember this little bundle, all 5 lbs. 8 ounces, wrapped in way more blankets than are needed in late April, bundled tight in a car seat, coming home. And I sat in the back with you staring at your every move, observing every breath, and wondered how I would ever again care about anything else in all the world. And your every move delighted and terrified me. You filled me with wonder.

And finally, last night, your little eyes started to droop and your voice grew quieter. "Mommy's tired." I whispered into your tiny ear. "Yeah, we're tired." You agreed. "Let's go to your room." You bargained. But I swept you up and took you to your room. Tucked my princess into bed after 4 books and prayers and more and more hugs. And my heart was so full I thought there'd never be a feeling in all the world that could replace this one. Never.

You have no idea how much. And that's okay. But baby girl, I love you. Always.

Love Mom.