Your Dentist is a Liar

I am going to post this and then I will be on my way to the dentist to have a filing replaced. The dentist is absolutely one of my least favorite places to go. I loathe it. Why? There are many reasons, most involve my very strong desire to avoid any amount of pain.  But also, my dentist is a liar. And I am sorry to have to be the one to break this news to you, but your dentist is also a liar. Sure he's friendly- smiles all the time, makes pleasant conversation before beginning his work on your teeth (sometimes during). Maybe even, like mine, he's gone to great lengths to put a television screen above the chair so you can watch t.v. during your cleaning. That's so nice. What a sweetie.

He's still a liar. Sorry.

It's okay. Don't beat yourself up for picking the wrong dentist. You had no choice in the matter. All dentists are liars. Yep, all of them.

Because all dentists say things like,

"I'll do whatever I can to help make you the most comfortable."
You'll do"whatever"? Really? Then why am I not in a hot tub getting a massage and sipping a virgin daiquiri in the Hawaiian islands while you magically fix my teeth WITHOUT touching me? Yeah, well then you didn't mean you'd do whatever it takes did you? Liar.

Then there's- "You're just going to feel a tiny poke."
Umm, if I can feel it, it isn't tiny. It's large and it hurts and my gums are sensitive and what about shoving a needle into them seems tiny to you Mr. Dentist? Li-ar.

Or my personal favorite- the sign that reads: "Gentle Dentistry".  Who on earth is going to fall for that one? That is just a bull-faced, smack ya in yer mouth, blatant LIE. No dentistry is gentle. Not any. Big. Fat. Liar.

What's unfortunate is that they can lie and totally get away with it because, well because I don't have all those fancy gadgets to clean my teeth with at home and they do look wonderful and sparkly when I'm done and I haven't the faintest idea how to go about fixing a toothache or replacing a filling or removing my wisdom teeth.  And they know this.  So they lie, and they clean and they replace our fillings and we just have to take it.

But at least we know the truth. And the truth shall...nope. That doesn't work here.

Well, I guess I'd better be off to where I am most comfortable and where I'll only feel a tiny poke because dentistry is so gentle. (If you can't beat 'em, join 'em?)